I must blog, I must blog, I must blog

Life since July has been up and down and down and up!
Four funerals, a new baby, a serious illness, six birthdays, an anniversary, a flooded basement, LDS General Conference, three trips to Wyoming, a trip to St. George and a genealogy conference.  I am behind on almost everything; especially blogging!

My father-in-law passed in August and it has been so difficult watching my mother-in-law struggle down the path of widowhood.  Then on the 23rd of October, my brother-in-law suddenly and unexpectedly passed.  Now, my sister-in-law must also wander down the widowhood path.  Too many funerals; too many widows; and too many memories for me along with Joe's birthday, my anniversary, and next week his death anniversary.

The pain and grief from losing Joe is finally bearable; and by that I mean I have learned how to live with it.  I know how to function and meander through life.  However, watching my mother-in-law and sister-in-law join me down this road has intensified my grief pain as I have seen their faces of shock and grief and heard their tears of sorrow.

I am thankful for the atonement that helps and assists me with this awful pain of grief.  I am thankful for the Comforter, who truly does comfort in those dark, painful and lonely hours day after day and night after night.  I am thankful for family who cannot take away the pain, but can walk beside me through it.  I am grateful for sweet friends who love and care (especially for the sweet person, who every anniversary secretly leaves roses on my doorstep).  I am grateful for my grandchildren who remind me to laugh and keep loving and who hug me like I am their world.   But most of all I am thankful for a man who taught me love and marriage are beautiful!

Life is hard.
Death is hard.
Watching another's pain is hard.

And, on Wednesday it will be 10 years!
Ten years is too long to be away from the one you forever love!
I still love him every single day and every single day I miss him.