The Sad Season, by Bob Lonsberry

I came across this column of Bob Lonsberry's today, and it speaks volumes. I hope that it moves you and causes you to ponder and think about your life; that is what reading this column did for me.

The simple fact is some Christmases aren’t merry.
They are something else altogether. They are lonely and sad. They are miserable.
They don’t have family and friends. They don’t have presents and trees and carols and cookies. They don’t have love. They have nothing but the haunting reminder of what they are not.
We find Christmases like that after divorce, or estrangement, or death, or in old age. When we struggle with our health or we struggle with our psyche. When life seems to have cut us loose, to have ripped us up and cast us adrift.
There are Christmases like that.
They can come in youth or middle age or when we are elderly and frail. And they can happen to anyone. Even to those who have known the sweetest Christmases.
This is for those people.
The ones for whom this Christmas is not merry.
I am sorry. I am sorry this pain has come to you, that life has treated you like this. I think I know, in some small way, what you are feeling.
And I think I know why.
At least I know why I sometimes feel that way. Like all is gloom and all is lost.
It is because I misperceive.
Not that things are not sometimes truly bad. Not that life cannot in fact be miserable. Not that sometimes we do not actually walk alone.
But still we misperceive. We see things wrong. Out of proportion or context. And we make the horrible worse. We accentuate the negative.
At least I do.
And I do it at Christmas because I think it’s about me. About my problems and my sorrows, my regrets and my reverses. I lower myself into the waters of my discontent, and sometimes I drown.
And that’s where I go wrong. Where I cut my own throat.
Because Christmas isn’t about me. And it’s not about you.
It’s about Him.
And to lose sight of eternal joys in the wallow of temporary sorrows is to make a fundamental mistake. To see Christmas as being about our lives, instead of about his life, is to miss Christmas altogether.
Not just the mistletoe and the presents and the loved ones, but the miracle that makes all those things precious and warm. Because, as wonderful as they are, as eternal as the love of family is meant to be, that is not Christmas.
It is made possible and given hope by Christmas, but it is not Christmas.
And to lack those things at this season is not to lack Christmas.
Because Christmas is the birth of the Savior of humankind. The commemoration of the mission of the Son of God among men, to teach them how to return to their Heavenly Father, to give them victory over death, and to open to them the door of repentance.
That’s Christmas.
The miracle of a tiny baby unlike any child ever born. The humility and love of a God who sends his Son to live and die so that billions of others might die and live.
That’s Christmas.
And that’s Christmas whether you’re among family and friends, or thousands of miles from home. Whether you are loved and cherished, or alone and forgotten. At the dawn of life, or on your death bed.
That’s Christmas.
And it is not diminished by the circumstance of our life. Not my life or yours.
And, in perspective, the difficulties of our lives are almost meaningless. So small and fleeting as to be of no consequence.
To anyone but us.
And to the babe of Bethlehem, who went from a manger’s embrace to a world’s rejection. Who suffered and experienced all, so that he might understand and comfort all. So that no pain of the human heart would be a stranger to him, or beyond his capacity to empathize and console.
He knows pain. He knows your pain.
And if you weep, he weeps with you.
And offers you both a hug and a way out. For now, and forever.
So as you struggle this Christmas, do not look at your problems, look at his love. If you struggle to stay afloat this holiday, do not contemplate your circumstance, contemplate his.
To endure Christmas, you must embrace Christmas. The real Christmas. Because today isn’t about today, it’s about 2,000 years ago. It’s about the eternal plan that has as its first seminal milestone the birth of Jesus Christ.
“Behold,” the angel said to the shepherds, “I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall to be to all people.”
All people.
Even you and me.
Even now.
If the good tidings of that faraway night do not bring us joy today, even amid our sorrows, then we are not listening.
We are not understanding Christmas.
I wish you strength at this difficult time, as tears and grief are your only companions. I wish you faith, to see beyond them, and to replace them.
That the gloom of Christmas will be replaced with the spirit of Christmas, with the Spirit of Christ. That your burdens will be lifted, your eyes will be dried, and your Christmas, if not merry, will be joyous.
Now and forever.
Bob Lonsberry © 2008
http://www.lonsberry.com/writings.cfm?story=2534

Google Eyes

There is something about these siblings that makes them all look related!!!

Christmas 1971

My first picture with my new camera. (Back) Dad, grandpa Goodsell holding Amanda, Grandma Roberts, (middle) Grandma Goodsell, (front) Mom & Lanette.

 I got a beautiful matching gold outfit just like Lanette's. Grandma Goodsell bought us the white frilly blouses, and mom made the vest and skirt. (See Amanda was the favorite, she got to wear her p.j.'s.)

Christmas Favorites

Can you guess what they're getting for Christmas?

Evanston, Christmas 1999

Carols: Little Drummer Boy, I could identify with him as a child. Carol of the Bells, beautiful, relaxing, beautiful.
Christmas CD: Muppet's Christmas Carols & Kenny G.
Lights: Any variety that doesn't make me dizzy.
Foods: Norma's fruitcake, white chocolate & peppermint, cranberries, pies, trying new recipes, chocolate, turkey, ham, etc, etc,
Traditions: Torturing teenagers with looking at Christmas lights in their pajamas. Baking and cooking Christmas treats, always made the husband very happy. Stringing popcorn for the Christmas tree.
Movie: Miracle on 34th Street
Books: Three from Galilee by Marjorie Holmes
Gifts

• easiest: Anthony, always needed a new bike every single year.
• hardest to find: Oopsy Daisy doll for Athena, they were all sold out.
• bestest ever: the year I got my first camera, and of course all those beautiful Christmas gifts the children made me over the years.
• handiest: my very first glue gun, and of course if it was a gun, Joe bought it for me!

Fortune Cookie Fortunes & Their Meanings

"Rely on long time friends to give you advice with your present question." In other words listen to their adivce!!!!


"You could prosper in the field of entertainment." Go to a movie, look on the floor maybe there will be a dime!!!
"Your wisdom will bring you much respect in later years." Those people respecting your wisdom are paid nursing home staff!!!!

The Blog Competition

Okay, for those who don't know my little sis, she is a little nuts. That is probably because we chased her with the vacuum, told her her parents didn't love her, and scared the beegeebees out of her from the moment she left the womb. She should be a little nuts, I am her older sister and I could tease in my day like you would not believe. Looking back the poor child did not have a chance for normalcy, but she is 8 years younger so she was and still is more resilient than I am.

However, this blog contest is a little over the top, even for her nuttiness. Somehow in her head she thinks this blog is a competition. However, she forgets I am the creative genius in the family and I have my little Blog experts Farrah & Nat who love and will help me if I get blog challenged. In addition, I have the cutest grandchildren pictures to put on my blog. So here goes, little sister,

• I will sacrifice the time I am spending on practicing for my piano recital, my two pieces are really coming along (March of the Wooden Soldiers and Still, Still, Still),
• I will spend a little less time decorating for the ward Christmas parade of homes (I am still unpacking from the move but never mind),
• I will spend a little less time with those grand babies even the newest,
• and maybe my Christmas baking will have to take a back seat (we will all miss those hand dipped chocolates, blame Aunt Mandy!)

All this sacrifice so you won't win the best blog contest. You are the youngest, the cutest, and our parents love you the most . Why should you win this contest too? I guess you could consider I'm a little like Bree on Desperate, I love a good competition.

The challenge is on...Besides I have three or four months to figure out how to get the grand children's pic's on the blog before her grand baby is born!!! I might even find my digital video recorder and add a video clip. Ha ha ha! Even if I found it I wouldn't know how to use it.

So, Amanda, a little message from me to you: go find me a gnome for Christmas and let your older sister win the blog contest!!!

New Baby

All is well with Trekker & Remington's new little sister and their mommy. Talilah Adeline was born Thrusday and she is just beautiful.

The 3 V's: Victim verses Victimizer

While I was droning on about my current crisis, a friend reminded me what another friend says, "If I had to choose, I'd rather choose to be the victim than the victimizer." (Valerie T.) This statement is empowering since it reminds us exactly what choices we do have.

Sometimes I feel so stupid and vulnerable when I don't see things coming. Like maybe I am not as sharp or smart as I should or could be, and I feel socially inadequate. However, my mind does not think like a perpetrator. This quote reminds me that I do have a choice; it reminds me that just because I don't foresee a situation, doesn't necessarily mean that I am inept. I don't foresee being mistreated because of my mindset, which is the way I think and see the world. And, the way I think and see the world is okay, the flipside would make me a victimizer, which is not what I choose to be, want to be, or how I want to see the world.

This quote also shows whose team and side we're on, the preying side or the side of the prey. Thank you Valerie, for the wise 3 v's to live by.

I just want to thank everyone who called or left a message for me yesterday. I don't think any of you understand how much that helps and how much I needed your support. I have come to learn that we cannot take the pain away of someone elses heartache, however we can make the road a little easier by being a friend. So, thank you to all of my friends, and I love you.
Janet

Joe (2:50 am)

And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
--Abraham Lincoln

It's been four years & I don't know what I miss the most. His touch, laughter, strength, humor, love, kindness, words, kisses, hands, hugs, funny business, wisdom, phone calls, smelly fish, stinky socks, clothes on the floor, snoring, or his voice. Every minute of every day, I just miss him so darn much.

Congress Voted Now You Can Vote Out the Bozos who voted for the $700 billion bailout...

At the polls, remember to vote out those bozos who ignored our opinions and voted for the $700 billion bailout! (daveramsey.com)

The 10 Cannots

By William J. H. Boetcker

• You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.
  
• You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.
  
• You cannot help the poor man by destroying the rich.
  
• You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred.
  
• You cannot build character and courage by taking away man's initiative and independence.
• You cannot help small men by tearing down big men.
  
• You cannot lift the wage earner by pulling down the wage payer.
  
• You cannot keep out of trouble by spending more than your income.
  
• You cannot establish security on borrowed money.
  
• You cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they will not do for themselves.
  

(William J. H. Boetcker (1873 – 1962) was an American religious leader and influential public speaker. An outspoken political conservative, Rev. Boetcker is perhaps best remembered for his authorship of a pamphlet entitled The Ten Cannots. Originally published in 1916, it is often misattributed to Abraham Lincoln.)

October 28, 2008

Athena, Remington, Trekker & I met Farrah & Matt in Layton at Chucky Cheese for pizza and games. The food wasn't so good, however, the grandsons as entertainment was wonderful!!!

Shoot 'em Matt

I only had a 20 minute nap, but I'm hanging in there

What a cutie, is this enough to melt your heart?

Hang on he drives like grandma Janet

My spaceship has landed!!!

Look what Matt won!!!

Mama & Remington

Mathew's snow (10/2008)

Doesn't he look just like his mommy!!!


(FYI---I just have to be honest so my children don't have me arrested for plagiarism, I don't really know how to take my photo's from my digital camera or even from my phone camera, I have to cut and paste from Farrah and Athena's blogs, or what they have sent me via email, or even what Anthony and Katie have downloaded on my computer. So thanks kids, some day mommy will learn how to upload, download, or whatever load from her camera, that is when she finally unpacks her charger for her digital camera)

Thoughts from the Widow's Lott--Is it Rude to Feed Leftovers to the Neighbor’s Teens?

Many questions have puzzled me since I became a widow. Now that I am sleeping alone, do I buy a twin bed or do I still purchase a king or queen? If I still purchase a queen or king bed, do I sleep on each side of the bed before I wash the sheets, or just wash them as b.w.--before widowhood? (Update: I did buy a queen sized bed and if you sleep on it sideways you do not end up with a dilema!)

After raising three children and a husband on one income I am very self conscious about pinching pennies. So, when I had half a pizza left and could not stand another piece for another meal, I offered the leftovers to the neighbor’s kids. I did not even think about the size of pizza when I ordered it a week ago, after all, the large combo is the best deal. However, now I have learned that if you have to throw away, give away, hide, or decorate the other half before you can use it, it is not such a good deal. (Update: Even the neighbor's teens get tired of your leftovers, however, you can freeze the pizza for later!)

The phone is another situation for the recently widowed that can cause confusion and indecisiveness. If you don’t get up and answer it, grown children and neighbors will worry. If you do answer the obnoxious rings then you’ll inevitably have to speak to someone. On the other hand, if the call is for your husband, how do you politely tell the caller:

• he’s no longer here, if it’s a salesperson
  
• mail that check made out to him anyway
  
• no, he’ll not be needing life insurance unless they can back date the policy
  
• yes his new address is the city cemetery
  

And face it, you are a widow and regardless of reason, you don’t always have to answer the phone; no one else is around to pick it up so why should you? (Update: That includes the front door. You don't always have to answer when the doorbell rings, however if you don't answer it make sure it is locked, some of your friends don't care if your not dressed and will walk in anyway! It is easy to forgive the friends bearing lasagna who just barge in!)

Thoughts from the Widow’s Lott--I Cannot Find the Joy in Cooking for One

A corndog and boxed scalloped potatoes with a side of ketchup are all that I can call my cuisine, not only for this evening, but rather for every evening. Sure, the colors and textures change, but quick and easy remain the common spice. At one season in my life, I baked bread and cookies. From scratch I made chicken noodle soup with dumplings. I also dipped chocolates, bottled fruit, preserved home grown vegetables, and perfected an array of sweetbreads, cookies, candies, and deserts.
I loved everything about the kitchen and cooking. One fallacy my mind baked up was that a delicious smelling home was a loving home. My mind quickly changed when toddlers and children were screaming, fighting, and even the smells from the kitchen could not convey a feeling of love.

As the days of my life passed and I moved into a less demanding season, my sweet tooth for easy to bake cookies and candies changed, to a medium-rare steak, fresh shrimp, cheese-cake, and atmosphere. I began to delight in the service of another human being rather than to try and wrestle a dish rag and handy mini vac to clean up after the meal. I relished being waited on rather than being the waiter. I enjoyed the various cuisines available to the paying customer.

After numerous potato salads, creative casseroles, amazing Jell-o salads, and menu planning that would confuse a professional chef; I am now carelessly eating processed and frozen foods. Micro-waving is now my preferred method of cooking and eating out of the original container is my norm. In fact, I learned if you eat out of the original container with a plastic fork clean up is as easy as the closest garbage can.

I find grocery shopping for myself confusing. My first shopping trip, as a widow, was an academic intangible enigma. It was puzzling, because I realized I did not know what I wanted to eat. I did not know how to think in small proportions rather than the most meal for a buck. I aimlessly wandered up and down the aisles. Confusion and hesitation at every usual stop along the well traveled super market route. I stood in front of the green olives. Did I even like green olives, or was it just a habit to keep them on hand for the love of my life?

As I stood in front of the array of brightly boxed cereals, I realized the last time I bought cereal for me I was more interested in the toy inside the box.

I finally left the store with a couple of food items, cleaning products and a confused mind.

'Never be afraid of trying something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark…professionals built the Titanic.'"

God's will

Wednesday I went to the temple with a friend and her daughter. The officiator was an older gentleman who could barely walk. He was stiff, had very crooked fingers, and looked uncomfortable. As I watched him I recalled attending a session where an older woman completed an endowment session lyng on her back on a gurney.

This little woman looked quite frail and needed assistance throughout the whole session. She laid at the front of the room and I recall promising myself to always remember her as an example of faithful temple attendance. I am certain no one expected her to attend the temple, and in fact it was probably more difficult than my mind could even imagine.

As I contemplated how our physical bodies wear out from use and time, my mind traveled to my friend whose husband was, at that very moment, lying in a hospital bed on a ventilator. He's not really that old however, his body is worn and damaged. Next I thought of Joe and how healthy his body was but, he did not have the opportunity to "wear it out."

Once again I was reminded it is all in God's way, will and time. Not even the wearing out or the lack of wear and tear on our physical bodies determines how long we will live. It is all up to our Heavenly Father. Our diseased, broken, or worn bodies cannot even determine our demise, it is only in the will of the Father.

Please keep the Clarke family in your prayers.

Nieman Family (4/2007)

Katie & Anthony (10/2007)

Smith family, Matthew, Farrah, & Bradden (4/2007)

Bradden & Anthony (10/2008)

Have you Ever...

Gone on a blind date? no
Skipped School? of course, and even more recently church
Fallen going up the stairs? uhm yes, and off of the stationary bike!
Been to Mexico? No
Stolen a traffic sign? I was an accessory to the illegal crime, but I learned, if your gonna steal, don't steal a blinking one!
Broken a bone? arm, thumb, and piggies
Been Lost? the more accurate question would be, when haven't I been lost.
Swam in the ocean? yes
Played cops and robbers? Not too long ago
Have you ever met a famous person? President Monson in the Provo, Utah temple
Recently colored with crayons? yes
Cried yourself to sleep? nightly
Sang Karaoke? Only after everyone leaves and the mic is still plugged in the Wii
Paid for something only using coins? Many times
Done something you told yourself you wouldn’t? yes
Laughed until a beverage came out of your nose? yes it's easy with girlfriends
Caught a snowflake on your tongue? nope, I blink and then can't see to catch one
Seen a polar bear? at the zoo
Danced in the rain? yep, made me need to pee.

I tag everyone who reads this post, to answer these questions and to post them to their blog

Prosecutor to drop case against DUI suspect

I saw this story on KSL, and wondered, "when are we going to be angry enough to do something?", and just know I wondered, "when am I going to be strong enough to do something?"

September 22, 2008

A Utah man facing felony charges for driving down Highway 40 the wrong way while drunk will get a free pass because his case has been dropped. A tragedy will allow this man to walk away from those charges. But there is nothing the prosecutor or sheriff's office can do.
Robert Sneed is getting another chance. Sneed's already had two previous misdemeanor DUI convictions. His most recent is a felony, according to court documents.
Sneed was caught riding his Harley westbound in the eastbound lane on a stretch of Highway 40 near Heber City in June. According to a DUI report obtained through a GRAMA request, Sneed smelled of alcohol and admitted to drinking "a couple of glasses of wine."

Sneed took a breathalyzer test. The report says he blew a 0.104, which is well above the state's legal limit of 0.08.
Wasatch County Attorney Thomas Low says, "I am disappointed that we couldn't prosecute it." Low can't prosecute the case because his star witness, the man who arrested Sneed, Sgt. Scott Hathcock, died unexpectedly last month.
"We investigated to see if any other officers could testify, if they were present at the scene, could have viewed the field sobriety test or the driving pattern or other things. There were none," Low says.

There were none because Hathcock stood out as an expert in DUI-related cases, but he tragically died in August when he suddenly collapsed during a traffic stop. Low worked with Hathcock on cases for nine years and calls him a stellar sergeant.

"Sgt. Hathcock was famous in our circles for his willingness to stick to a case until the very end," Low told us.
Low says, ironically, it won't be this one.
We contacted Sneed's attorney's office for a comment but our calls were not returned.
As for any other cases that may be affected by Sgt. Hathcock's death? The Wasatch County Attorney says maybe a few misdemeanor cases but nothing as serious as Sneed's case.
E-mail: mailto:lprichard@ksl.com
http://www.ksl.com/index.php?nid=481&sid=4333814

Highway 6

Many people travel Highway 6, and there are many stories, memories, and losses upon that road. I began traveling Highway 6 in 1983 when Joe began working at Hunter Power Plant in Emery County. Over the years I have seen deer, elk, moose, eagles, hawks, and a couple of years ago I spotted several wild turkeys.

One year, when the children were little we happened upon the infamous beer truck spill. A delivery truck had taken a corner too fast and rolled over and the contents of the truck, Milwaukee's Best, floated freely down the river for the catching. Most travelers pulled over to fish out a couple of cold ones.

I have seen terrible snow storms, beautiful autumn leaves, and fresh greenery in spring along that road. I have traveled many hours in many different vehicles on that road. Highway 6 was where I even got my first speeding ticket, after 28 years of driving.

All that being said, I have also had some harrowing experiences upon Highway 6, including the incident Monday evening around 6:45 pm. After the rest area there is a narrow portion of the road where the bridge over the railroad track is being replaced. Immediately north of the construction zone, I spotted a black bear running alongside the road. Scared the bajeebees out of me. He attempted to dart out in front of me, I swerved, missed him and he crossed the road behind me. I pulled onto the shoulder shaking like a leaf, then made sure the doors were locked. Who knows he could have wanted to eat me!!!

Now, I have one more memory to add to my travels on Highway 6. Drive safe.

"Lessons from Liberty Jail"

Farrah and I were talking about trials and hardships. The following day this talk was on KBYU, and I found great comfort in hearing the words from Brother Holland. It was a gentle reminder of what I know about trials and enduring, and it was a souce of encouragement.

Jeffery R. Holland
9/7/2008 CES Young Adult Fireside

Speaking of the conditions and trials of the Church and the prophet Joseph Smith, Pres. Smith said, "Perhaps such things have to happen." "As I have read the histories of those days, the days that went before and the days that came after, I have reached the conclusion that the hardships, the persecution, the almost universal opposition to the Church at that time were necessary. At any rate, they became school teachers to our people to help make them strong."

"man's extreminity is God's opportunity"

It was during this period of time, in the dark depths of Liberty jail that the Prophet Joseph Smith wrote Sections 121, 122, & 123 of the D & C.

D&C 121:7
...peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thy afflictions shall be but a small moment;

D&C 122:7-8
...know thou, my son that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall by for thy good. The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he?

D&C 123: 16-17
...a very large ship is benefited very much by a very small helm in the time of a storm, by being kept workways with the wind and the waves. Therefore, dearly beloved brethern, let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed.

The Three Lessons from Liberty Jail
1. Everyone, including the righteous, will be called upon to face trying times. God has not foresaken us in our trials.
2. When we have trials it does not mean that we are unrighteous or unworthy. Suffering comes also to the righteous. Remember, Christ has been where you've been.
3. In the midst of difficult feelings and trials remember the powers of heaven cannot be controlled or handled. Don't blame or lash out at God, or others.

When we weep, God and the angels weep with us. He has not foresaken us in our darkest, lonlinest hour.

When what has to be has been and when we have learned what we need to learn, we will recieve from the Spirit beautiful glorious answers from the Father.

Angels are around and about to bear you up as you go through trials.

Heavenly Father and Christ have planned, prepared and guaranteed your victory over your trials, if you desire it; have faith and endure it well.

Law Of The Garbage Truck

Letter to Dr. Laura (dr.laura.com)
Date: 2008-09-19
One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport. We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by just inches! The driver of the other car whipped his head around and started yelling at us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. I mean, he was really friendly.So I asked, 'Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!' This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, 'The Law of the Garbage Truck.'He explained that many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes they'll dump it on you. Don't take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Don't take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the streets. The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take over their day. Life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so...Love the people who treat you right. Pray for the ones who don't.
Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how you take it! Have a blessed, garbage-free day
Sarah

Good Grief

How crazy and nutty a new blogger can go just trying to import a new background and links. Oh well, not far from crazy to begin with. I just love looking at other Bloggers sites to see what their families are up to. Now I know where all the mommies are!!!

Favorite Quotes:

Imagine what it would have been like if, from the moment you were born you had been told how beautiful you really are---Nadya Giusi