Yesterday I was told twice by two separate people that I was strong. Hummmmmmm, I'm not so sure about that, but while contemplating the thought, I had a few other thoughts...
I have no choice, what are my options?
a. my heart stops beating because it is broken?
b. A magic fairy waves her magic want and Joe is alive again.
c. None of the above
Guess what, news flash we don't get to choose, there is not magic fairy, so it's c-NONE OF THE ABOVE!
People don't see me on the days I cannot crawl out of bed, get dressed or quit crying. But maybe that IS being strong--being gentle enough to allow those days and kind enough to the world that I don't show it.
One of the reasons I want to share this grief journey is I want everyone to know that this is NOT easy. I NEVER want anyone to say, "But Janet made it look easy." Nope, it's not.
There is a healing and maturity in honesty--not dwelling and not self pity.
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